new wooden pods

joren's building us some wooden pods to float around in. or bury me in. i better keep my eye on this project.

shoe tree

i've never seen such a prolific shoe tree. i mean, shit. i was thinking of foregoing beets this spring for a shoe tree, but really. what are the chances of getting this many old, smelly, unpaired shoes?

shroomtastic

i found this cauliflower mushroom recently. i also found a hobo living in the woods. i put the mushroom in my sack but just poked the hobo with a stick.

jingle pants

holy craptown! i found my blog. i thought i left it either under the bed or maybe next to the cat litter box. turns out it was in the crisper. anyhow. i've found it and will be doing a better job of posting from now on because believe you me, there has been some shit goin down. hold tight!

The things i liked best about las vegas: as seen from the airport

1. The catch phrase "smells like a winner".

2. The personalized key chains: no "Beth", but of course "Dylan" and "Ambrosia".

3. Losing a dollar on Wheel of Fortune slots. I, apparently, did not find the loosest slots in town. Possibly a blessing in disguise. I can still hear the haunting chant Wheel! of! Fortune! Telling me again and again, You! Are! A! Loser!

I'm not saying  I don't like Las Vegas. I'm saying I really don't like it. Unless you're a rock climber or have a penchant for giant buffets, of course. Then you should definitely visit.  They've got some beautiful mountains here. And some beautiful mountains of peel and eat shrimp. The dual-flush, water preserving toilets are no where to be found. And the recycling bins? They must sort it all out at the dump. And I didn't get the memo saying it was okay to take your shoes AND socks off in public places. And I'm not fancy, ask anyone. It's confusing. Then again, where else can you get a twelve dollar spicy mango margarita at 7 in the morning? I'll give Vegas that much.

they say spring's here, but it was a stinkin 33 degrees the other morning

the plastic ones cost more, but they're really worth it.

just in time for easter!

so apparently, the countenance of god shines on my face. a customer at the bakery told me. as you can see, things are happening.

quite possibly the best compliment i've ever received

"Your uterus looks dynamite!"